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Friday, April 16, 2010

What is a friend, anyway?



So, lately I have been asking myself this question. What exactly IS a friend? Sometimes, I feel I may put a lot of weight on this word. I mean, I take "friend" very seriously. I expect a friend to be there for me, not just when times are good and it's time to have fun, but when times get rough. I look at a real friend like family. Yet, I am always surprised at how other people, even those I've considered my friends, take that word so lightly. There seems to be no loyalty, people are dishonest, and take you for granted. I try to be there for my friends, but I am only one person, so I do the best I can. Maybe they're doing the best THEY can? I don't know...

I have friends and associates - they are two different things to me. Friends are the ones I can talk to about serious issues, who I know will be there for me, and I know without a shadow of a doubt they have my back and for the most part, they can be trusted (I never trust anyone 100% because people are just human and all have flaws). Associates are those I may chat with here and there, go out with, maybe shop with. You know, just the fun stuff.

How do you all view friends/friendships? I'd love to hear and get all your opinions, whether you agree or disagree :)

6 comments:

Kingsmomma said...

I agree with your view. Friends are like family. Associates are just folks you know and talk to on occasion. A friend knows the real you whereas an associate accepts what you show as the truth. There is a level of intimacy that is never broached when dealing with an associate.

ASWilliams said...

I a wonderful friend circle. But in dealing with humans I expect to be disappointed (some disappoint me more than others). Trust and loyalty are very important to me and I struggle with forgiveness. Once one of those things are broken or lost, its hard for me to invest in the relationship further.
To be honest, my associate circle is very small. I don't do well with the in between stuff. So either we're all in or we're not.

CallaLily said...

Yes, I do feel that freinds and accociates are in different catagories. Two points that I guess we should remember is that we should focus on being the type of freind to someone else that we want others to be to us. While people will fall short of our expections and wants, as long as we do our best to be a friend we will reap that back in some form. Also, some freindships may only be for a season. Along that way, if the bond isn't as strong as before, it could just be that for that period of time the relationship served its purpose. Does that make sense?

Neems said...

@keetaray You said it best. My friends are close to my heart and because of it I am loyal to each one of them. Eventually some of them become like family, but it doesn't happen overnight,lol. Yes, he or she might disappoint me, but I might do the same thing so it's mutual. Problems only arise when people expect perfection and hold grudges. As CallaLily said "its better to focus on being the type of friend to someone else that we want others to be to us."

NaturalMommyinGA said...

I agree with you about friends and associates. I have a group of girls that I know no matter what they have my back and vice versa. Sometimes I think people use the word "friend" to loosely!

KeetaRay said...

It seems we all have pretty much the same view on friendships ;)
@CallaLily And I also agree that we should also look into our ourselves to make sure we are being the friend that we'd like others to be for us.

Great comments!! :)